I'm trying to spend less time online again.
!UPDATING THROUGHOUT NOVEMBER!
Last year this time I attempted what I call a 'No Internet November'. Inspired partially by all the
random productivity videos I binged and partially by the need to focus on my studies I tried to eliminate
all doomscrolling from my life for a month. It didn't go that well. I wanted it to be a prerequisite to
do a sort of a dopamine detox.
I failed tho.
This November I'm trying again. Driven by the need to finally lock the fuck in. I uninstalled social media
apps from my phone (kept Instagram since it's primary way of contacting my friends, though I set up a strict
time limit and told my friends to contact me elsewhere were I not to respond). I also logged off from distracting
sites both on phone and my computers. I didn't block youtube, but I disabled history, meaning that there
is no home page filled with recommendations, meaning all I have is my subscriptions.
So while I'm calling this the No Internet November Challenge again, it's not as strict as last year. I just
want to focus on school more while scrolling less. That's my goal. I'll see, I might try to tight up the
rules as I go, but right now all I need is to get to my thesis.
UPDATES DOWN HERE
03-NOV-25
So far so good. I had a bit of a rocky start, since I allow myself to watch some youtube. I spent a lot
of the first day watching really long form videos that I had open in my browser tabs for weeks. But I still
had a lot of time left, since I wasn't getting sucked to endless feeds every time I felt a bit bored or
distracted, so there's a small win right here.
I spent most of yesterday working on my thesis. It went slow, but I did manage to write a huge chunk, and
(I'm trying to be cautiously optimistic here but) I think that it I might get a bit better in writing it
as I go and I'm on my way to hit the 30 pages goal by the end of this month.
Honestly the best thing that came of this so far is the fact that since I don't have anything interesting in
my phone it's so much easier to keep it out of reach before going to bed. My evenings and mornings are a bit
calmer now and I really like that. I did the same thing for a few days over the summer but it was much
harder than it is now. I'm also using my ebook reader a bit more, especially before sleep. I'm reading
this super comfy manga, Hirayasumi. Really nice before the bed.
Also also, since I'm not being constantly distracted by the internet, gaming! For the past few days I've
been stuck in the motion of opening my steam library, scrolling down, back up, and closing steam to scroll
on twitter or whatever. I'm not sure weather it's fuelled by the lack of easy scrolling or by the pick of
the game I'm playing, but I'm having absolute blast with Alan Wake 2.
That being said, it still felt like there was something missing. Like one of those dry ass chicken breasts
with rice and no seasoning meals gymbros post on their instagrams. And I'm not sure what to make of it yet.
04-NOV-25
Yesterday I came back home from school around 8PM. I spent the evening online. Not on social media, which is
great, but still. I probably should've done more with my time. I always get back home exhausted from the long
commute.
Similar thing has happened today again. I'm typing this around 14:30 and I feel like garbage. I spent most of
the day so far helping my sister look after her kids. In between I either browsed the web, watched some youtube,
I tried gaming for a bit which is almost impossible with my nephews... I read for a bit, but I still feel
like there's something wrong. Something missing maybe? Idk. I am anxious about my school and I'd rather
eat a bus tire then go to work tomorrow.
I think I am a bit sick. I'm feeling the brain fog, I don't
want to do anything, but at the same time I don't feel like not doing anything, if that makes sense.
06-NOV-25
Remember how I said that I am not restricting youtube? That disabling recommendations would be enough?
Yeah I played myself. I spent the last two days mostly watching random youtube crap about european
socio-economical issues and vintage computing. Yeah I need to set some kind of restriction, time based
perhaps. But I am not counting it as a failure. Not yet. I still have the time and the will to lock in
for the better part of this month.
Also it is the time for my semestral panic attack! Yipee! I am not going to get into the details here,
though I might cry about it in the reports page. I am just gonna say that I could not sleep from being
so anxious about my school and job, that I feel like a garbage zombie today. On the verge of... Well it
is not that dramatic. But still, I feel like I am gonna crack any minute now. I think that I used the
scrolling as a form of distracting myself from my problems. Now that I have to face it all without any
distraction I am buckling under the pressure.
Haha yeet nechci žít.
08-NOV-25
Full blown fail here. I am not working on my schoolwork. I am not focusing on my job. I am logging back
onto twitter again. It feels like I cannot escape this. It is either twitter or youtube. Cant really do
anything without it.
What matters now is what I am gonna do next. I can either fall back deeper and deeper into despair of my
internet addiction or I can pick myself up, dust myself off and keep trying.
We will see tomorrow.
11-NOV-25
Yeah I guess I failed at the end. Didn't change much over the past few days. There were some highlights,
when I was present, disconnected from the internet. But it's mostly back to the mind numbing doom scrolling
again. I feel like twitter and youtube tightened its grip around me. I even started browsing 4chan, since
it wasn't part of the initial rules. My brain wants to scroll so bad it's actually scary, I never visited
4chan before (don't worry though, it's mostly the technology board, I'm not interested in 4chans discussion
of politics).
There were some really nice moments over the past few days though. Like using spray paint for the first time
in my life, watching the F1 sprint and race with my whole family. Spending the better part of the day ricing
linux and actually making it look decent for the first time. Reading more. I guess what I'm trying to say
that the main goal of this challenge was to become more productive, which failed, but I am actually doing a
little bit more with my life. Even though it's not the direction I wanted to go. 